When you met your girlfriend, she was exciting, fun and spontaneous. She wanted to have sex all the time, and liked to surprise you with sexy new lingerie. After a few months of this, things got a little more serious and she invited you over to meet her parents. While the meeting went well, you left feeling a little anxious about your relationship because your girlfriend’s passionate spontaneity seemed to have been replaced by something else. It was like she was turning into someone else: her mother.
Is your girlfriend going to be just like her mother when she’s older? Are you worried that this change may negatively affect your relationship, or are there qualities her mother has that you’d be happy for her to adopt? Men often worry that their partner is going to turn into their mother, particularly if their mother is difficult to get along with. How can you tell what your girlfriend will be like when she’s older?
Here’s some information on how to tell if she’s turning into her mother and how to deal with it, if it happens.
Good Mother-Daughter Qualities
Having your girlfriend develop qualities and traits from her mother doesn’t have to be a bad thing. In fact, it’s pretty hip to be dating an older woman right now-just think about Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz or Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore. If your girlfriend’s mother is hot and single, your buddies might well be interested in her, so you shouldn’t be surprised by this type of suggestion.
Let’s start with the obvious-what will your girlfriend look like when she ages? Meeting her
parents and older siblings will provide you with a good indication of how gracefully she might age. Did she get her looks from her mother or her father? Is her mother attractive? Have her and her mother been mistaken for sisters rather than mother and daughter? If you answered yes to last question, then chances are good that you’ve got nothing to worry about!
However, you should consider other physical factors as well when determining if your girlfriend is turning into her mother. For example, is her mother overweight? Even if your girlfriend is slim, her having an overweight parent increases the chances of her putting on weight and keeping it on later in life.
But remember, before you start judging her based on what her parents look like, take a look at your gene pool. You may only have that head of hair for a few more years before it starts to fall out and you begin to bear a striking resemblance to your own father! Ouch!
The Mother-Daughter Qualities You Don’t Want to See
You’ve all heard the horror stories from men who have married attractive, exciting and wonderful women, only to have them turn into…yes that’s right, their mothers. It may be hard to believe, but here are some clues to look for when determining whether your girlfriend is turning into her mother:
- She’s starting to clip coupons-When you started dating, your girlfriend didn’t even take the time to go grocery shopping because she was happy just being with you. Instead of slaving over home-cooked meals, you two went out for dinner and drinks and then went back to your place for a sleepover. Now she’s planning meals, clipping coupons and asking your opinion on newly purchased table napkins. What happened to that sultry woman you fell in love with?
- She’s throwing parties, but they’re not very fun-Instead of hosting a sex toy party for a group of her female friends, your girlfriend has taken a page from her mother’s book on parties, and is now hosting Tupperware and stamping parties. She’s not asking you to help her test out interesting new lubricants or vibrators anymore; instead, she’s packing your lunch in Tupperware and leaving you notes she made in stamping class.
- She’s spending more time with her mother, and less time with her friends-When a woman prefers shopping with her mother for table linens and dishes, over shopping with girlfriends for sexy underwear and body piercings, you know you’ve got a problem. When this happens, there’s little you can do to stop her from crossing over to the dark side.
- She prefers buying Martha Stewart magazines to her former favorite, Cosmopolitan-Now, instead of trying hot new bedroom moves on you, she wants to try new curtains in the living room and a new recipe for your birthday. When you buy her a Cosmo as a surprise, she looks at you like you are crazy, and says that she doesn’t need to read those magazines because she’s not single anymore. Take a deep breath!
Dealing with the Mother-Daughter Dilemma
Those are just some of the qualities you can look for in your girlfriend, to determine whether she’s turning into her mother at a premature age. And, if you happen to notice that she has adopted many of these qualities, you don’t have to panic or run screaming from the room.
Instead, take a deep breath and try to figure out whether her changing personality and behavior is having an ill effect on your relationship. Does your girlfriend prefer stamping parties to spending intimate time alone with you? Is her mother starting to control your lives? Those are more serious problems that need to be dealt with before they get out of hand.
Whatever you do, during a fight, don’t tell your girlfriend that she is turning into her mother. This will cause irreparable damage to your relationship, especially if it is true. In fact, avoid talking about her mother at all.
Rather, deal with the situation by trying to win back that passionate lover your girlfriend used to be. Plan a romantic weekend away; buy her lingerie; get a book on sexual positions and it together while in bed. She won’t be able to resist for long, and before you know it, you will have your old girlfriend back! As long as you and her still enjoy each other’s company, and are intimate together, who cares if she clips a few coupons?