The purpose of this article is to give you, the reader, some ammunition next time your significant other claims they have a headache. The first section deals with fourteen scientific reasons why and how sex is good for you. Forget all your whining and begging, now you can wow her with some real stats! The second section lists reasons that are against having sex.
By studying those reasons, you can come up with a strategy to undermine them. Read on, and make ‘not tonight’ a phrase that is never used in the bedroom, or any other room.
14 Reasons to Have Sex
- Increased pleasure! Women and men can actually cause their sex organs to atrophy. The clitoris can actually lose some of its function if it is not stimulated, which causes blood to flow into it. The good news this situation can be reversed if one participates in sex regularly.
- Making love reduces your likelihood of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes.
- The sweat produced during sex cleanses the pores and makes your skin healthier.
- Having sex burns calories. The more sex you have, the more you burn off. It sure beats the treadmill!
- Sex is a sport that is equivalent to swimming laps in a pool. In most cases, multiple muscles are used, offering a cardio workout without ever leaving the bed!
- During sex, endorphins are released into the bloodstream. Endorphins not only feel good, but they elevate the mood of most people, alleviating sadness and depression.
- Another interesting thing about having sex is that it often creates a desire in your partner to have even more sex. Most animals release pheromones, which have receptors in your partner’s senses. These scents act as an aphrodisiac, which means more sex for everyone!
- Sex can also act like a mood normalizing drug. Rather than take a drug to help you relax or sleep, sex can have the same effect, without the price tag or side effects.
- The more you kiss, the more you will create saliva in your mouth. Saliva helps to keep your teeth in better shape, by helping to digest and remove food particles in your mouth. Furthermore, more saliva means moister lips.
- Sex is good for headaches, not bad. Remember the last time you were hung over? The only time you don’t feel sick is when you are having sex. Sex actually helps to relieve tension, not increase it.
- In addition to relieving hangovers and headaches, sex can also help to combat hayfever and sinus infections.
- You will feel sexier! Psychologically, the more loving you are getting, the sexier you will feel. People can sense the confidence, and you will be more attractive to members of the opposite sex.
- Did you know that studies have shown that when women make love, they produce double amounts of the hormone estrogen? Estrogen is the most important hormone for women, and is responsible for a multitude of good things – hair color, memory, and skin elasticity – to name a few.
- It is important for men to ejaculate on a regular basis. Sperm is produced in the body, and should be cleared out at least once a week.
40 Reasons Not to Have Sex
- The pitter patter of little feet
- Never let ’em see you sweat
- Your parents might realize that you’re not 12 years old anymore
- Naked men
- Guilt, guilt, and GUILT
- You might like it
- Rhenquist, Scalia, Kennedy, Souter, Thomas
- Paying back oral sex debts
- Only pagans procreate
- You might fall in lust or, Heaven forbid, love
- Body hair
- Too many lights on in the room
- Your roommate and neighbours can’t sleep with all that screaming
- Axl Rose
- Since that nasty little Gulf War, there’s no money left for research and treatment of those nasty little Sexually Transmitted Diseases
- Why bother doing it yourself? Just buy the new Prince album!
- Yeast infections
- Too sticky
- Messes up your hair
- Charley Horses
- Bladder infections
- “It’s only a cold sore”
- Photographers with infrared cameras (remember, if it can be seen from a public place, it’s not private)
- Hetero men who ask “Did you come yet?”
- SOMEBODY has to sleep in the wet spot
- Taking off the used condom.
- In horror flicks, people having sex are always the first to be killed by axe murderers in hockey masks
- The ever popular Eternal Damnation
- You still live with your parents
- You love her but you’re not in love with her
- Creation of sounds not meant to be emitted by the human body
- Calling out the wrong name
- Potential threat to your political aspirations (unless you’re a Kennedy)
- Your brother gets home from school at 3:00
- No one to have sex with
- Carpet burn
If you are still having a tough time convincing your woman to have sex, then you may have to rely on your old system of saying ‘please.’ But try a little science on her and see where it gets you. Hopefully, it will get you back into the bedroom for some good, healthy lovemaking.