Ah, nature. There’s nothing like the smell of pine needles, the sound of wind in the trees, the itch of poison ivy on your…well, you get the idea. While you might consider yourself a real nature lover, taking your sex life back to the basics can be a whole different story.
There are a number of things you’ll want to pay attention to before embarking on a night (or afternoon) of steamy passion in the woods. Luckily, you now have full access to a step-by-step guide to sex in the great outdoors – or make that “great sex in the outdoors.”
Making your romp in the park a memorable experience often depends on what you and your partner are looking to get out of the experience. If half the excitement for you is the thrill of getting caught, while she’d die if someone in a pick-up truck saw her exposed in a field of wheat, you need to talk this over. If you don’t, a moment of passion could turn into a sore spot – and we’re not talking about the kind caused by grass burn.
Assuming neither of you wants to put on too much of a show for rural neighbors, there is a certain amount of planning you can do, as well as things to be aware of before you bare it all to Mother Nature.
The first three words you should be uttering (no, not those ones) are “location, location, location.” While the idea might strike while you’re driving through the countryside, giving you absolutely no time for planning, it’s sometimes ideal to have a bit of a heads-up.
Brenda (26 year old) says she had a great outdoor sex experience, but it was tempered by a number of factors.
“The downside was that we spent a good 20 minutes trying to find the right place,” she says. “Every time we pulled into what we thought was an abandoned driveway, we’d see kids driving by on bicycles, or a house a few yards away. It wasn’t a complete downer, but it did take away from the immediacy a bit.”
The solution is not to get too passionate until you’re reasonably sure you’re in a deserted area. That can save you the embarrassment of the “I just couldn’t wait” moment, when the two of you are entwined in a grassy ditch, and the sound of a homeowner with her lawnmower startles you out of your reverie.
Some of the problems that can arise once you’ve scouted out your location have to do with a lack of anticipation. It’s not so much that you have to know exactly when you’ll be doing it, but planning ahead for the possibility never hurts.
Rachel (23 year old) says her outdoor sex experience, on camping trips or on the beach, was ultimately less than she’d hoped it would be.
“It was exciting when it started – racy, dangerous, sexy – but once it had been a few minutes and the euphoria wore off a little, it wasn’t so ‘hot n spicy’ anymore. You realize where you are, and that you’re dirty, and you just sort of want to go home, shower, and cuddle up,” she says.
Sex in nature doesn’t always have to be dirty – sometimes it can be as good, clean fun as it gets. But if you you’re completely unprepared, and keeping sand out of those hard to reach places might be difficult.
Something as simple as having a blanket in the back seat of the car can make the experience that much better. While you might have envisioned a bed of soft grass and leaves, nature can be a harsher reality. Better a blanket than a bed of poison oak. You don’t want your souvenir of the occasion to be a painful rash.
“Bring a blanket for sure, if you’re going to be on the ground or anything,” says 25-year-old Stacey. “And scream to your heart’s content.”
Stacey says her experience with outdoor sex was completely positive, and part of the benefit was finding different places to do it, beyond throwing a blanket on the grass.
“I have done it on the back of a car on a deserted road in the country,” she says. “It was very good. I also had sex on a rock at a camp ground, which was fantastic, I think, because the position was different from what we had been used to. I suppose the thrill of getting caught heightens the intensity as well, even if there is no chance.”
One problem that can arise when you decide to take out sex life outdoors has nothing to do with nature, and more to do safety.
“One thing we really didn’t think about was needing a condom,” says Brenda. “I didn’t expect to be having sex, so I didn’t bring one, and he doesn’t usually keep one in his wallet. We had oral sex instead, which was still great, but a condom would have helped.”
Again, the solution for this problem is easy – throw a condom or two in the glove compartment. Or, if you want to be even more prepared, why not make a sex travel kit? A small bag with condoms, a bottle of lubricant and a toy or two can be easily hidden, so that it’s always there when and if you need it.
Part of a healthy outdoor sex life can be having a back-up plan. Sometimes the elements can conspire against you, making the whole thing less fun, and more of a “we started this so we’ll finish it” experience.
“It’s not as romantic as the movies, really,” says Rachel. “And it’s cold.”
An experience like Rachel’s can be avoided by just admitting that this might not be the best time for an outdoor excursion.
“I’ve only done it once, and lucky for us, it was a beautiful, sunny day,” says Brenda. “If it wasn’t, I’m not really sure what we would have done, except wait until we were home again.”
There’s nothing wrong with calling it quits – you’ll probably have more regrets if you pretend it’s not -2 Celsius, and that you’re not lying on a thorn bush. Having to wait until you’re safe in your apartment again can even work in your favor – by the time you get there, you’ll be so excited it won’t matter that there are four walls around you.