Dating is by no means a graceful sport. It is awkward and uncertain, challenging and often just plain humiliating. We have all made mistakes on dates. Some are recoverable, some not so much. Have you ever been in a dating situation where you really like the person, but fate intervenes and makes you look like a huge ass? Is the date salvageable?
Here are some tips on getting out of some the more common, and less potentially fatal, moments of dating.
1. You are hanging out with a wicked hot chick all night, but totally forget her name.
We have all been in the situation where we are introduced to someone and within ten seconds, their name has vacated your brain area. If you realize right away that it is gone, you can recover. My general rule is that if engaged in immediate conversation with the afore-mentioned individual, you have about a minute to find out their name with a quick, “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name there….” If you don’t strike up a conversation right away after the intro, you can always pull the whole, “I’m sorry, I’m so bad with names…” later when you pick up the conversation with her.
Once these two opportunities have passed, it is no longer cool to ask, as it will just sound like you could care less what her name is, ergo, you feel no need to expend the effort to remember it. One sure way used to be to ask for her phone number, whereupon she would supply her name on the back of whatever bank receipt her barely legible number is scrawled on. This has been complicated by the wonder of all technologies, the cell phone. How are you supposed to label her in your directory if you don’t remember her name. (*Painful experience tip: if you forget her name, putting her in your phone under the title of some perverse act she performed will not get you any originality points.)
As a last resort, you may have to pull out the old “I have the worst i.d. picture in the universe…No, I bet mine is way worse than yours” trick.
2. You drank way beyond your limit and are for sure going to barf or pass out soon.
If you have had too much to drink and still have the presence of mind to realize it, do not, I repeat, do NOT attempt to sleep with a girl you are interested in seeing again. Even if she is also inebriated, chances are that she will remember the fact that due to excessive alcohol consumption, you either couldn’t get it up, couldn’t keep it up or couldn’t get it down. No matter how drunk a girl is, she will remember in the morning.
If you find yourself beyond a reasonable level of tipsiness, try to give her a kiss goodnight before the upchucking and make sure you have her number tucked away in safe place before you pass out on the subway ride home.
3. You realize halfway through the date that you have been talking about your ex for most of the past hour.
This is such a no-no. First, consider the fact that you may not be ready to start dating if she’s all you can talk about in the company of another beautiful lady. If you suddenly realize that an ex has been dominating the conversation, your best bet is to immediately shut up and turn your full attention onto your date. In fact, try not talking about any topic unless she brings it up for the rest of the night. This is a really difficult thing to recover from and a massive dating mistake. The only way that you might salvage that date (and I stress might) is to be so attentive and interested in your date for the rest of the night that by the end she’s thinking, “Well, rough start with the ex talk, but he seemed so interesting after that.” Let’s face it, the most interesting people are often the ones who make us feel interesting.
4. You told a girl you would call, didn’t, and then run into her while wining and dining a date you’re actually interested in.
This could be potentially fatal, largely because all women have had this happen, and we don’t look too kindly on men who say they’ll call and don’t. Plus, if you are confronted, you immediately lose any shaky credibility you might have had promising your current date later that you’ll call. Chances are, she won’t be waiting by the phone.
You can cross your fingers and hope that the girl you didn’t call got the hint that you aren’t into her, but if she feels spurned and thinks she can get you back by making you look like a schlep in front of another girl, she might take the opportunity.
If you’re smart, you will avoid the situation and the girl as soon as the potential danger is recognized. It takes a keen eye and a quick mind to both recognize and avoid the confrontation, but that is really the only way you are going to get free and clear of this one. If you see the spurned woman heading your way, the best bet is to head her off at the pass so that any uncomfortable confrontation that transpires does so out of earshot of the current date. Whether you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom or mumble something about having to greet an old friend, do anything you can to keep these women separate.
The bottom line when dating is that women are willing to forgive a lot if they find that you are attentive (don’t forget her name), good in bed (no whiskey dick), sincere and honest (don’t get busted in a lie) and available for her (no ex baggage). You can also pull off quite a bit if you are willing to laugh at yourself, be a little self-effacing, and are willing to admit when you are busted being an ass. In fact, if you have what it takes to pull it off, you will find that very few women can resist an ass. When in doubt, always be the first to laugh at yourself.