Vulva. This is one of the few words referring to a woman’s body that you are probably not comfortable with. However, there is no reason to fear the vulva, because the vulva, my friend, does not fear you. In order to dispel your fear, apprehension and curiosity of the dreaded “v” you need to educate yourself. Just be warned that you may end up knowing more about her “down there” than she does…
Women are more emotionally and physically complicated than men. Because women can’t see the packaging of their sexual organs as well as men, many take their “down there” for granted. But if most women don’t understand all the workings of their own body, why should you? One word – pleasure. The more time you take to understand the vulva, the less time it will take you to work your magic upon it. Furthermore, the better you are at finding your way in and around her special spots, the more she will eager she will be to return the favour.
There is no reason to be intimidated by the vulva – it is not as complicated as it may initially appear. “Vulva” refers to all of the external female genitals, including the labia, clitoris, and vagina. These areas have traditionally been a mystery to both men and women, due to the coverage of pubic hair. With the increasing trend towards removal of this hair, many of the vulva’s sensitive areas are now exposed and more accessible.
The most obvious area of the vulva is the labia. The labia are the outer layerings of a woman’s genitals, commonly called lips. There are outer lips (labia majora) and inner lips (labia minora). When they are not being stimulated, these “lips” are folded together, and serve to protect the women’s openings. During sexual arousal, the labia majora expand and flatten to expose the area and vaginal opening. The labia minora or inner lips are the folds of tissue inside the labia majora that look like curving petals. The inner lips are not as thick as the outer ones, and they contain many sensitive nerve endings. During arousal, the labia minora become larger due to increased blood flow.
The clitoris is located above the vaginal opening, towards the top meeting point of the labia majora. The clitoris is the female body’s version of the penis – it is very sensitive and during sexual activity it becomes engorged with blood and erect (though it is, of course, miniscule in comparison to the size of its male counterpart). While it may be small in size, the clitoris is of great importance to a women’s orgasm and must not be overlooked.
The third main component of the vulva is the vagina. Everyone is fairly familiar with this body part – it is the opening that allows for penetration of the vulva. Many people make the mistake of referring to the entire region as the vagina, but technically it is intended to refer to the opening only.
Understanding the physiology of the vulva will only get you so far. You need to personally experiment with all of its components in order to understand what really turns a woman on. There is one primary truth about the vulva, however, that no man should forget: The clitoris is the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Massaging the clitoris with your fingers or tongue is a foul-proof plan when it comes to pleasing a woman. A combination of clitoral stimulation and penetration is also a no-lose proposition, so don’t be shy about exploring these regions simultaneously…
For most men, there remain several lingering issues and concerns about the vulva….
No. 1: Who Ordered The Fish?
A woman’s natural odour “down there” is constantly changing, depending on the time of the month, her menstrual cycle, the amount of sex she has, and her diet and exercise. These factors determine the amount, type and scent of the oils and discharge that the vulva releases. If you notice that her smell seems somewhat stronger than usual, you might choose to wait a day or two, and chances are it will be different. At no time, however, should a woman smell like a fish market – if her smell is seriously offensive (ie. you can smell it through her jeans) there is a chance that she may have some sort of infection.
No. 2: You Want Me To Stick It Where?
The vulva has three openings: the vagina, the urethra and the anus. Both the vagina and the anus can be used for penetration. Though vaginal intercourse remains the most widely performed, many women find their anus to be more sensitive than both their clitoris and vagina. The urethra is almost invisible and is largely off limits – unless, of course, you are looking to participate in golden showers…
No. 3: Seen One Seen ‘Em All?
Like mens, women’s external genitals vary greatly in appearance. There are differences in the size, shape, color, and hair coverage of the vulva and all its component parts. More so than men, women’s body’s also host a variety of internal sex organs. Once you have familiarized yourself with all of the exterior features of the vulva, you are well advised to learn even more about the interior. The pleasure that you both can derive from knowing where to find all of her sweet spots is endless…
No. 4: Cunnilingus – It’s A Good Thing?
Cunnilingus is oral sex performed on the vulva. “Cunnilingus” comes from the Latin words for vulva (cunnus) and licking (lingere). This act is most successful when it involves direct stimulation of the clitoris. Some women find cunnilingus to be the more satisfying than penetration and many report that oral sex is the only way they can achieve orgasm. So yes, it’s a good thing.
If you pay attention to a woman’s vulva, chances are she will return the favour to you in a similar fashion. Take this into consideration when you are “down there” experimenting with all of your new-found vulva knowledge. Get her to tell you or show you what makes her feel good. Best use your hands or tongue, tease her and ask “Here?” every few minutes. Then when it comes to your turn, she will become the student and you – the teacher…