One of the battles of finding a relationship as you get older is finding the single people. Week after week I hear my single friends (and, okay, I do it too sometimes) lament, “How am I supposed to meet someone when I don’t know where all the single people are?” It’s a valid concern.
The best way to meet someone who you might be interested in, however, is often to do the things that you love to do, thereby putting those with similar passions in your path. A ripe, and often untapped, venue for meeting some cool ladies is at a concert. If music is at all important to you, then you already judge many of the people you meet partly on where they fit into your own little personal hierarchy of music. Why not hit the venues that are likely to be packed with babes with mutual taste in music? At the very least, if you meet a woman at a show, you will have at least one thing in common and a way to open the conversation.
If you are not terribly into one particular type of music, you have certain advantages. For instance, you can hit a range of shows and meet a range of girls who you will not exclude based on your musical snobbery. Different types of music definitely attract different types of women. To follow is a list of musical genres and the types of women you will meet at each venue, along with pick up tips for approaching them.
Standing venues like clubs are always best for wheeling at shows. First, there is a built-in ID system so you don’t inadvertently pull a Gary Glitter. Music draws a youthful crowd, so be careful at those all-ages shows that you are only scoping of-ages (usually wearing a booze wristband). When you are in a club, you have the advantages of the club (buying girls drinks is always a favorite in my circle), with less of the awkwardness of the approach.
Once you spot a girl in the crowd, simply find your way over to her. Once there, it will be readily apparent if she is with her dude or with friends (girls like to snuggle up to their man in crowds; guys like to grope their girls). Once there, do not attract attention to yourself by screaming and whooping at the band like a madman. Too much enthusiasm reminds girls of those tailgaiter guys that paint their faces. Clapping, whistling, and the occasional rock hand signal (when appropriate) will do.
Do dance—girls love a man with moves, and will often let you dance with her. Do it for just a few steps and finish it off with a grin, turning back to the band, however. Otherwise, you risk seeming cheesy or creepy. You don’t need to be dismissive of her, but your attitude should be that you are there to see the band first, and then flirt with her a close second.
If you are anywhere close to a mosh pit or some rowdies in the crowd, you are in the best possible situation. If you use your body to shield a woman from harm, she will be yours forever. There is something enduringly attractive about a man physically protecting a woman. It’s gentlemanly, yet really manly at the same time.
Pop concerts are usually held in larger venues, which give you more of a pool of potential ladies. Pop music girls are usually cute, fun-time girls who like to bubble-gum aspect and dancibility of pop music. They are also often quite young, so you might want to be checking IDs or risk waking up in a panic as her Mom is knocking on the door in the morning, trying to get her up for math class—at the local high school.
While the larger venue does provide a larger pool of fish, it does create some logistical problems: while you might spot some cuties and be able to move on them, unless they are sitting in your section of the arena or theatre, you are going to have only the relatively short time between the opening band and the headliner to make your moves. If you are lucky enough to be in a general standing room type situation, you are in luck (see above for the crowded room moves).
Country music is a classic for attracting a wide age-range. There are a lot of fresh-faced country girls who are rough and tumble, yet perhaps not so wise to your big-city moves. Small towners always hope to meet someone when they go to a concert. If you think your dating pool is shallow, try facing the fact that you are going to have to start cycling through guys you dated in high school again, just for lack of options! The other type of lady that country music shows are known for is the cougars. For some reason, the cougs love the country. And if you are a little shy and prefer the woman to make the first move, then a coug might be right up your alley. A little older, a little more experienced and confident, and all excited after seeing that cowboy hat-sporting denim clad tush shaking it on stage all night.
Rock shows generally bring out the girls who are little rougher around the edges. If you are looking for a lady who can hold her own in the drinking games, who isn’t afraid to put her jeans on with a coat hanger, and who could probably defend you from the moshers, a rock show is your venue. Chicks who love a good power guitar riff are hard to come by, but they are loyal and tough as nails.
Punk shows are great, if you attracted to disaffected youth. I would divide this category up into two: those who would be at a “pop” punk show—the new brand of easily digestible “punk” that has been coming out; and those who would be at a real punk show. The pop-punkers are probably younger and fall into the category of chicks who used to hang with skate boarders (or skateboard themselves). The real punkers will be a much more alternative, pierced, and inked crowd. There will be some young hopefuls, but the older ladies will appeal to similarly inked and pierced dudes. People who consider themselves fringers of society, probably carved themselves at one time, and are now just trying to find a more grownup way to express their angst, like whining and going to S&M clubs.
Finally, there is the alt rock girl: nerdy-cute; seemingly meek, but fiercely political in a sweet way; a girl who knows as much, if not more, about the band playing as you do. The alt-rock girl is easily frightened, but chances are, if she has a boyfriend, he’s a feeble wimpster who you could probably take out with a withering look.
Check your local listings. Music venues are ripe for meeting girls who not only have interests outside of needlepoint, they might just enable you to support the local music scene, and get out there and find new interests of your own.